Thursday, March 19, 2009

Cutting the cable - sort of

Talked about doing it for decades. Threatened to do it for years. Today I did it; goodbye, cable.

I would have dumped it completely but high-speed Internet is catnip for freelance writers. I don’t think I could work without it, even if I were writing nothing but fiction.

The "sort of" bit: internet only, no TV is $69 a month. Broadcast TV and Internet is $55 a month. So we are officially one of the very few households in Comcast’s subscriber base with the most basic of basic cable. And it will save us over $600 a year. It will be like the old days, six channels and not a damn thing to watch.

The financial benefit was not the motivation. I was fed up with paying for bad TV. I mean, TV has always been bad, but it was less aggravating when you didn’t get a bill for it every month.

Cable news stinks on ice. Everyone on “Morning Joe” should be placed in solitary confinement until further notice. The plasticized alien zombies on CNN should all come out of the closet and admit what they really are: beauty pageant judges. And the Fox flywheels should be assembled into an ad-hoc anti-terror unit and shipped to Afghanistan without rifles, bullet-proof vests or cameras.

Cable comedy is base and offensive. There’s no M on MTV. All the chefs have left the Food Network. The “History” Channel has gone from 24/7 Hitler to 24/7 UFO whackos. “Mythbusters” jumped the shark two seasons ago. Hate it all (almost.)

I am a complete geek so I will miss a few things, like the Weather Channel, “How It’s Made” on Discovery – possibly the most boring show on TV – and “Modern Marvels” on History, possibly the best thing on TV, bar none.

But that’s a small price to pay for the enjoyment of getting $600 to have the screaming cable pundits put a sock in it.